Snow should not fall in the South

I was raised in "snow country". Cleveland Ohio! When people whine about their snow - telling them I spent 19 winters in Cleveland usually shuts them up. Ah yes! "Lake effect snow". It snowed there from early October through April. Auch - the Easter Sundays I feuded with my mother over having to wear "galoshes" (rubber snow boots to you guys under 50 years of age!)
It really took the glow off your new fancy Easter outfit to top it off with clumsey big rubber snow boots ...(usually black or red for children).

Anyway, with the influx of people in our local community from Northern climates, I hear a lot about "How I wish we had a REAL snow" --- "I miss my snow". To this refrain I say -MOVE BACK TO THE FROZEN TUNDRA YOU BLOCKHEAD! THIS IS THE SOUTH!

This is the South. We drink "sweet tea", eat grits - not me personally- but they are immensely popular here, and swelter in the summer heat and humidity. We suffer through the heat and humidity of July and August for the priviledge of being in the South where we are not supposed to have SNOW and ICE! It is a trade-off and someone is reneging on their part of the deal. I remember the misery of 106 degrees in August - the sizzling leather seats in my car that required a towel to be able to sit without blisters. For that I was to be paid with a mild winter... not to include an icy driveway and icicles hanging from my clog-free gutters.

Today, my husband had to take detours to get to work and avoid mess where the ice had magically transformed our major road (41A) into a parking lot. I received a call at 7 AM from him saying - stay in the house - do not go out until I give you the all clear. These roads are a skating rink! Is he nuts? I would not walk to the mailbox if I suspect ice. Many of my bodily parts are failing- several are aching and I am not - NOT going to voluntarily put what remains intact in jeopardy of being mauled by an icy driveway.

However, I have a $5 coupon from Walgreens that is only good today and I have several things I wanted to pickup... life is throwing me a curve here. After all , it is a $5 coupon not one of those puny 25¢ coupons.

Another scary thing - we have good neighbors. Quiet, elderly ... good people. They seldom come out of their houses. Hermit-like. A scary thing happened this AM. I had the local news on the CBS morning show and all of a sudden - I see something familiar. Our back yard. It seems "Mr. Never Gets Outside" has a digital camera and had taken pictures of the accumilating snow and emailed it in to the tv channel. Innocent stuff however, Glad I was not out there hauling garbage to the can or something. I did not know he knew how to connect the camera to the computer. Beware of quiet neighbors!

So I will slow down, have another cup of coffee, start a load of laundry and write out some bills. All the while keeping an eye on the weather outside. Watching those icicles for signs of warming up.

Just to let the seasonal planners know, I expect a discount on my hot weather this year in August to make up for the day I had to endure less than "southern" weather in February. It's only fair.

OKAY! NOW I'M MAD!

I work hard! At 60 it does not take as much to constitute hard work - but I think, by most standards, I do work hard at what I do.

What I do, is manage a small non-profit thrift store to raise money for individuals with mental retardation. Just two old ladies who refuse to say "uncle" and give up the job. We are open Monday-Sat 9-5. We sell stuff really cheap. Everything is donated and we do manage to sell a lot. As a mother of a son with m/r, I see folks who have many needs. Living on SSI -usually around $640 a month is not easy. We try to help.

Okay- back to why I am pissed. Last night the other old lady closed the store at 5 PM. She cleaned up, locked up and set the alarm and left. Shortly thereafter we got the call that the alarms had been activated. Because we have had some "alarm issues" lately, we were a little upset, but Dollie (the other old gal), turned around and headed back to the store. Where she found the doors unlocked!

Someone had hidden inside the store until she left and then "thought" they were going to rob us. WRONG! You see, we have motion detectors. As soon as they moved - BOOM! lights, whistles and bells went off. We also have video and although it is grainy - we see the bitch (sorry) killing time outside the store smoking a cig- until she could come in just before closing and do her thing.

My husband and I have watched this video until our eyes are ready to bleed. Time to call out our secret weapon! We have a friend in the AV dept at the local college and I am hoping he can take this tape and search it frame by frame then print off a picture of this battleax!

I remember my mother hating a childhood friend of mine because she thought her to be a petty thief! My mom would not permit this child in our home. "I cannot abide a thief!" she would rant. She was right - I learned later that the girl would steal the fillings out of your teeth if you left your mouth open as you slept! Yeah- she was bad. Now I feel the same way. I have never had to hide things in our home. I knew I could trust my children AND THEIR FRIENDS. We always left odd money or jewelry laying on the kitchen counter and no one ever bothered it. Things like feeling secure in your home is important.

ARC Thrift store is my second home - I want to feel secure there too. The locksmith will be there shortly to add advanced locks to our store. More keys - more buttons. I suggested going to Rural King and buying an electric cattle prod! Run it under the clothing racks each night. That should discourage thieves from hiding under there.

I hope that nasty person got a good scare when that alarm went off! I hope they crapped their britches! Lazy no good person needs to go to work.

**Notice to our thief!***
Flip some burgers - mow some yards! Get a life and get the hell out of mine! You violated my security, my right to feel safe in what I consider my inner sanctum. Go to work! You are no better than the rest of us and we are tired of having to look over our shoulder at your bad deeds. Yup! Cattle prod - put it on my list!

How Great Was Your Geography Retention?

I do not remember spending a lot of time in school studying geography. I think the teachers hated it as much as the students. Maybe that is the excuse I am using to explain my pitiful score on a geography quiz I tried from my cousin, Maria's blog! http://apps.facebook.com/travelpod-challenge/.

I thought I would try it once - she said she completed level six and her husband got to level 10 - well we will not discuss my levels. Suffice it to say, if I hit the right hemisphere I felt successful. Why I kept confusing France and Spain befuddles me and I spent 3 years in Germany so I should definitely know that. Maybe their map is colored wrong - Germany was blue I think in my elementary school textbook. Yup that's it! Wrong colors! Think I am grasping at straws, try this little fun test - see if YOU know where the DRC is... good luck!

Procrastination Stinks!

Okay - so I have a grandson. I have made that abundantly clear. I found the perfect gift for his first birthday --oh, sometime last Fall. It was in an L L Bean catalog. I considered ordering it and having it ready for February 12 when he will be the "BIG ONE". Nah - it is large and heavy and I did not want to mess with shipping it twice.

Knowing what I know now, I wonder WHY I did not have it shipped to my daughter and tell her to shove it in the basement until February! It is not like she does not have room AND since my grandson is not very mobile, it is not like he will venture down the stairs to the basement to hunt for future gifts.

Bottom line, I did not order it, and LL BEAN will not carry it until the Fall. I called "Joan" at LL BEAN and confirmed that it was not available. She knew what I wanted because she said she had many calls wanting that item. Now, that raises another issue. Is retail not in the business of selling stuff for profit? If you do sell toys all year, and you know certain items are big sellers, WHY NOT STOCK THEM ALL YEAR? Have we created plethora of companies who thrive on the short sell? Create the demand and then deny them access to the merchandise?

Just look at this face, (so okay, he is a little ham when a camera comes out!) does he not deserve my first choice for a birthday gift? I have found an acceptable second choice - took no chances and ordered it and had it shipped to MA. He is too little to know it is not the first choice; but I will always remember that I could not provide the perfect gift for Sawyer on his first birthday. Next time little guy - You will get first pick!

Storms bring out the loonies!

We were under a tornado watch for much of today. Weird for Tennessee in January- but it has happened before so it should be taken seriously. The skies were black and lightening crackled overhead. Rain was coming down so hard you could not see across the parking outlot outside the store where I work. I had no plans to trot outside. It seemed silly considering the tornado sirens were wailing from Austin Peay a few blocks away.

And yet, in the middle of the mayhem, I had customers who wanted to bolt outside to get back to work on time. WHY?? She was a government worker at the court house that never cared about being there on time any other day! Yet in a tornado inspired downpour, she bolts outside and tries to manage her packages, car keys and umbrella. Not pretty.

We stayed pretty close to the ladies bathroom that we had determined to be the safest, interior room. Besides, if we were to be trapped somewhere, being near the "facilities" would be a bonus.

Two hours later, the skies cleared a little, the rain slackened and one by one we ventured home. The city street workers discovered why they should have cleaned the leaves out of the storm drains during the pleasant fall days instead of waiting until a river flowed down 3rd Street. Ah! Procrastination. I fought the impulse to point and snicker as they stood in the rain and pulled assorted debree out of the street drains. Sorry guys- that is the price you paid for sitting in Dunkin's drinking Coolattas in Sept instead of cleaning up the streets!